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VANILLA ON THE SIDE

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Something major has been going on in my life for about a week now.  This something was urging me to grab my laptop and write for hours, sharing the incredible joy and fun and excitement that have been overwhelming me.  This something made me feel happy and peaceful and safe.  This something is beautiful, alluring, dense – and unspeakable…

 

Anybody who ever read any of my entries would imagine me as a person lacking the very ability to experience embarrassment or shame.  This of course isn’t quite true – there have been plenty of infamous episodes in my life that I’m light years away from being proud of.   Yet even those utterly humiliating moments quite often have potential to become great pieces of writing, useful self-searching tools, and with time – fun anecdotes.  So I willingly uncover them.  Blunt openness and fairly explicit straight-forwardness are much more natural for me than reserve and shyness.  And yet this time I can’t make myself step over “decency”, “respectability” and “normality” – the concepts that I’ve been always claiming to discard as false, pretentious and harmful.  However keeping it down, locked in, unsung is quite unbearable, if not wrong…  So let me attend to the use of a rather ridiculous metaphor.

 

We all love ice cream.  Some love it more than others, but there are not that many of us who openly hate it.  And we all agree that there just gotta be something wrong with these ice-cream-loathing folks.  Without a doubt, ice cream is universally good.  It’s delicious.  It’s hard to resist.  The more you eat – the more you crave it and so forth.  Most of us can’t imagine any festivities without classics like apple or pumpkin pie – with indispensable vanilla-flavored ice cream on the side.  And we all know that there’s just no way around it – it must be vanilla!  Anything else would be plain wrong!

 

I agree – vanilla-scented desserts are archetypal and never ever could we do without.  After all the evolution took care that our….emmm… taste buds were developed in a certain way.  We are born to love vanilla.  Which is partially the reason why many of us go through life without checking out any of the myriads of other flavors.  Ok, in the recent years strawberry and chocolate became quite common as well, but not far beyond that…

 

A little while ago I’ve discovered that ice cream doesn’t even have to be limited to one certain flavor!  I’ve learned that you can take many and mix ‘em and shake ‘em up and add some syrup or filling to the base.  I became aware that though it is socially unacceptable to share your ice-cream (or – god forbid – give it away for temporary… tasting), it can be highly enjoyable, rewarding and exhilarating.  And once you try it, you might realize that we’ve been greedy and possessive about our ice cream, misled by the powerful giant brainwash organizations like… Baskin Robbins!  I’ve learned that talking about different aromas and flavors can be another pleasant addition to the main course – let your imagination unwind and come up with new tastes – unknown, untried, uncommon, raw… 

 

Though what really bothers me is that vanilla-loving people have very little tolerance for other flavor-devotees!  It is surprising considering that the process is (relatively) the same, regardless of ingredients.  It is this utmost lack of tolerance, the unconcealed aversion and unbending cruelty that make me write this blog entry – this very important, vibrant, happy blog entry – in thoroughly retarded dessert analogies! 

 

Oh folks, I have a dream – that one day I will be able to sing my song in clear and simple terms, without worrying of drop-kicking anyone in their vanilla guts by my bizarre honesty.  One day I’ll describe indescribable – and what a fascinating story it will be!

 

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